I stood there that day, helpless, with our seven-month-old baby in my arms. In front of me, my beloved wife was laughing and joking with an office colleague, getting ready to leave in the car. Yet, how sweet our life had been. In a moment, she had destroyed it all by getting involved in a lowly relationship. I could only watch with sad but quiet eyes. There was no situation for me to speak in. My heavy heart just kept pounding. Our little baby girl in my arms kept crying incessantly. Perhaps even nature was weeping in sympathy with her cries. Yet, not even a bit of her mother’s heart melted. They say a woman is happiest when she experiences motherhood. But I never saw any reflection of this in my wife. After being silent for a long time, I called out in a trembling voice, “Sharmin!
Sharmin was about to get into the car, but she stopped when she heard me call out. Suddenly, it seemed to Sharmin that my voice trembled. But, losing her conscience, she didn’t look back. I glanced at the little girl for a moment. Seeing her innocent face, my manly strength broke down, and tears rolled down my cheeks. In a tearful voice, I said, ‘You can stay if you want, Sharmin. She’s still a child. And…’
I couldn’t say the word ‘love’ that day. It was a love marriage. It’s only been two years since we got married. Separation is simply unacceptable at this point. No more words were coming out of my mouth. I was biting my lip to hold back my tears. This pain cannot be explained to anyone. On the one hand, there’s love, and on the other, my own daughter. What a cruel time. It becomes a human being’s duty to endure the painful consequences of fate. Yet, Sharmin asked calmly and indifferently, “You’ll get the divorce papers. Let’s go.
With those words, Sharmin got into the car and was gone in a flash. I knelt on the ground with my daughter. I was never a soft person, but that day, I cried out all my pain. My daughter cried with me. I couldn’t tell if it was the sorrow of losing a mother or something else.
Days turned into weeks, and I faced the toughest time of my life. There was no one at home except my daughter. I had to dive into the battle of life with her. I worked day and night. Yet, I never got involved in something as formal as marriage. My heart was filled with despair. It’s difficult for a man to raise a child alone. In this difficult life, I found support in my younger sister, Rasika. She would look after my daughter all day. In the evenings, she would go home. I didn’t even have the face to go to my own home because I had married against my family’s wishes, and my parents had disowned me. Yet, my younger sister helped me to the best of her ability. After working all day, I would come home, take care of my daughter, and cry silently like a woman. A man’s tears don’t look good, but when the situation is terrible, you have to endure everything.
Years have passed, and my daughter has grown up. She’s a doctor now. She’s so attached to me. I’ve never shown her her mother’s picture. But it’s as if she’s a reflection of her mother. Sometimes, when I look at her, it pains me. I keep trying unsuccessfully to understand if I’ve been a good father. But…”
“Ashin, dear!”
Hearing her father’s sudden call, Ashin hurriedly closed her father’s diary and placed it back where it belonged before he came in. Wiping her tears with her scarf, she went out of the room and stood by the front door. Robin smiled when he saw his daughter standing there. Seeing that innocent smile, Ashin felt like crying. How much pain her father had endured in his life. It’s not something one can forget in a lifetime. Seeing her daughter’s red eyes, Robin asked worriedly, “What happened, dear? Why are your eyes red? Have you been crying?”
Even at her father’s words, Ashin felt like crying. But she swallowed her tears and said softly, “Just some sand got in my eyes, that’s all. Why does it look like that? Come inside.
Robin, trusting his daughter’s words, stepped inside. He had been to the market. Every Friday, the biggest market in the village was held. So, he had bought everything they needed for the week. He had been living in the village for almost a month. The reason for coming was that he had been transferred to a government hospital in Ashin’s Shantipur village. Robin had actually arranged this himself. He felt it would be better to spend the last few years of his life in this village, away from the city. Moreover, his daughter agreed with him. Ashin preferred the rural life to the busy urban life. That’s why they came to this village.
“Dad, I’ve served your food, come and eat quickly,” Ashin said while working.
Robin also came to eat after a while. Just then, someone knocked on the door. Father and daughter looked at each other questioningly. As soon as Ashin opened the door, covering her face with a scarf, a man, panting, said, “Doctor, you are needed at the chairman’s house today. The chairman’s mother has fallen ill. Please come quickly.”
Ashim looked at his father. His father nodded in agreement. Ashim went to his room, stuffed a necessary item into his bag, put on a mask, and left with the man. Before leaving, he also told his father to eat.
The man was walking in a hurry. Ashim could tell that something serious must have happened. He didn’t know the Chairman’s house, but he had heard about it from the hospital nurses. In the area, if anyone was a big doctor, it would be Ashim, so he had been called. After walking for a long time, they finally reached the Chairman’s house. Crossing the iron gate and entering inside, Ashim followed the man. He felt uneasy, but it wasn’t showing on his face. This was Ashim’s first time at the Chairman’s house. Although he had heard the name, he had never seen the faces of the people in the house. A beautiful two-story building amidst the trees. Quite attractive. A few people were working around, perhaps they worked in this house. They were looking at Ashim as if he were an alien. Ashim was very unprepared for such a strange gaze. As soon as they entered the house, the man took Ashim to a room next to the downstairs stairs. Ashim became even more unprepared when he entered the room. The large room was full of people. It seemed to Ashim that all the big and small members of the joint family were there, and they were all looking at him. Among them, Ashim’s eyes fell on one person. He recognized the man. He had seen him once at the hospital. His name was ‘Uchch’. The Chairman’s middle son. A nurse had told Ashim the name. Uchch’s eyes were like a cat’s. His gaze was fixed on Ashim. Seeing Ashim, a woman came closer and said, “Are you Doctor Ashim?”
Aashin looks at the woman. Dress-Asha is classy. Beautiful face. Aashin nods his head and says, “Yes I am.”
“Look at what happened to him. He has vomited many times since morning. How are his hands and feet cold?” The woman said in a worried voice and stood away from the old woman.
Ashin checked. How lonely he feels in the crowd of unknown people.
“Not much problem. I am prescribing the medicines. If you take them properly, you will be fine.” After writing the names of the medicines on the paper, Ashin handed them to the man. He stood up. “Come.” The woman stopped Ashin as he was about to leave.
“Stop mother.” He came to Ashin and patted his head and said, “Your money..”
Ashin looks up. He never takes money when he goes home and treats. So said, “No, aunty, these are not necessary.”
Just then another girl comes and says to Ashin, “Why are you showing kindness or us? So brave?”
Ashin is shocked. He never imagined such a thought. The woman scolded the girl, “Keep your mouth shut. Don’t you know how a respectable person behaves at home? Get out of here.”
Everyone looks at them. Aashin understands very well that a very bad situation is being created and will happen in the future. So he repeats, “Sorry if I said something wrong. But it is absolutely impossible for me to take the money. You will be fine. I will come today.”
So Ashin started walking. No one said anything. But as he was leaving the house, someone called from behind. Ashin wanted to go back. Standing tall. Coming towards him.
“Hi Dr. sit down I am Uchch Talukdar. Let us advance you.”
“Thank you, but you don’t need him. I can go,” Ashin replied from behind his mask.
Saying this, Aasin started walking. Meanwhile, Uchha looked at Aashin from behind. He was seeing this doctor for the first time. He had never seen him before. Even though the face was not visible, his eyes were very magical. It happened. He suddenly liked the girl’s serious and hidden behavior. He must be three years younger than her. Uchch kept looking at the girl as she walked. He had seen it once before, but he had not noticed it so well. It came to attention very well today. From behind, he himself said loudly in a serious voice,
“Be careful.”
Uchch does not know whether Ashin heard it or not. He is surprised by his work again.
