Even though I fought till the end, I could not save the end.
Russell and I got married in the presence of my father and local dignitaries.
Baba Sevaar handed me over to Palash from their house.
And said, Murray, you have kept everyone in this family.
From now on that is your family. They are all yours.
So always try to keep everyone good. Only then will they all love you.
Today, my father gave me Russell’s hand from my father-in-law’s house and said, “My daughter is very unfortunate father. You should never hurt her.”
There is a big gap between that day and today.
That day father told me about my rights and responsibilities.
But today it was said about my helplessness!
My new life has begun.
You can say cursed life instead of new life.
Russell, who had been keeping the minimum politeness with me for a long time, started misbehaving with me like a dog and a cat!
The more I behave, the more annoyed I get.
It is only natural that an ugly middle-aged woman like me would be ignored not only by Russell but by every man in the world.
But unfortunately I lost Palash.
And Russell’s family forced me into this marriage.
Now if he turns away from me, what will I live with?
If Palash could have gifted me at least one child then I could have spent the rest of my life with that child.
At that time, the society would not have had the opportunity to coerce me so much.
Russell has not even touched me since the wedding.
Never said a good word to me.
But how long will it last?
The whole world knows we are husband and wife.
Russell couldn’t deny it if he wanted to.
And if so why do I knock again and again?
With the change of time, I myself gradually started to become greedy.
I forgot that Russell is only Rumana’s deposit to me.
I became desperate to become a mother of Russell’s child at one time.
Where men forced intercourse, I repeatedly gave myself up to Russell, giving up my shame. This is how I became pregnant for the first time.
But Vidhi Bam! During the eight months of pregnancy, my first daughter was born!
But the child is alive and not dead!
Thus, as long as the marriage relationship with Russell lasted, I forced myself to have a relationship with Russell.
I think having a child will change Russell completely.
At least he will love and respect me as the mother of his child.
But Allah did not want that.
He wanted something else.
In the first five years of my marriage to Russell, I had four children in a row.
But I was never able to give birth to a live child.
Each time I gave birth prematurely.
And every time I gave birth to a dead child!
I have been married to Russell for almost ten years now.
In the first five years I was able to give birth to a dead child, but in the next five years I was never able to conceive again.
At one time, I started pouring all the money I had saved behind the doctor.
Hoping for only one child.
In the end, the profit was nothing, even the little money that I had saved in the middle was gone.
After our marriage, what I was most afraid of was that Rumana would not cause an accident.
But Rumana didn’t do anything, maybe she calmed down alone by shedding tears in silence.
But later he never married anyone else.
He spent the rest of his life alone.
I have heard that Rumana said that she accepted only one husband in her life.
I cannot accept anyone else.
The society and family members subjected the girl to unspeakable mental torture for not getting married.
Yet she never agreed to marry.
Maybe because of his curse today I have this change!
Later I tried hard to get Russell and Rumana married.
Because multiple marriages of men are accepted in our society.
But Rumana never agreed.
He made it clear that it is not possible for me to be the last life partner of whom I could not be the partner in the first life.
I am a failed woman.
I didn’t get a husband, I didn’t get a family.
Until today, I have not found any answer to why I am clinging to this survival.
Russell has secured a job in Dhaka to sort of get away from me.
At first, parents used to come home once a month to meet their parents.
But after father’s death now he does not come even once in two or three months.
And even if he ever comes, he does not spend the night at home.
I tried so hard to keep him at least for one night but to no avail.
He reached Dhaka under any pretext.
Some people in the area started saying that Russell had another marriage in Dhaka.
But I never believed.
Because if Russell marries a second time, only Rumana will have the right to be his wife.
Because Rumana has sacrificed a lot in life for him and suffered a lot.
Finally people’s words came true.
Suddenly one day Russell came home with a lady with a 3 month old baby.
The woman told about her relationship with Russell in her own mouth.
They are husband and wife. Russell married her two years ago.
Even though the daughter has been sheltered at her father’s house for a long time, after the birth of her grandson, they no longer want to keep the daughter and son-in-law in their house.
So Russell came straight to his house with his wife.
As far as I understood from listening to the conversation, the lady knew nothing about me.
In other words, Russell’s marriage with me has been kept a secret from him.
But once he came to the village.
Then there is no question of not listening to us.
Everyone in the house took the new wife home with great joy.
An era has passed since Palash’s death.
Many people in the area have forgotten about that bloody conflict.
Both my father and my father-in-law are dead.
So the promise made by the father-in-law is now only a passing one.
No one in this house has time to worry about it.
Everyone is happy to have a new wife, only I have a wound in my heart from the loss of everything.
As many years have passed since the murder, there is no longer any fear of the old disaster among any of this family.
Meanwhile, another incident happened.
The new wife heard about me from someone and locked the door in that room and did not open the door.
